By Julie Lepa, MSN, RN

“YOU HAVE 30-SECONDS TO GET TO THIS ALTAR!” said the Evangelist at a retreat in Berchtesgaden, Germany. Now that I have your attention, I wrote an article for our church magazine around 1984ish under the title, “They Came Expecting.” It was a powerful altar call that day. The military people were literally scrambling to get to the front of the auditorium as quickly as they could. They were seeking a fresh encounter with Jesus. I will write more about that another time. I want to share another part of my life, the beginning of my journey.

So, what happened?

First, I am Jewish. My entire family is Jewish. You were either Jewish or Christian and Christians were the enemy. We were taught that Jesus was TABOO. There was only one God and Jesus was not it. He was a good teacher, but that was all. My dad would say that Jesus had a good PR department. If Judaism was good enough for Jesus, it was good enough for all my fellow Jewish people.

However, there was a problem. Everywhere I went, I kept running into these weird people. They were so happy! Not to mention, they were PLEASANT! YUCK. They talked about second birthdays, and even celebrated the date. What was wrong with them? This was so unlike me.  I felt anxious around people that were not Jewish. I was invited to church Bible studies many times in high school and college which I naturally refused to attend. Jews did not mingle with Christians in a religious type setting.

Fast forward to when I was 20. My family had just moved near Vista, California, about an hour and a half from Los Angeles. My goal in life was centered around acting and I was going to be a BIG STAR. That was my dream since childhood. I was the lead in my high school plays, I was president of my high school drama club. I even went to a summer program at the American Academy of Dramatic Arts in New York City! In my mind, I could not lose. I had the looks, the talent, and even wound up with an interview with a big-time agent in Hollywood, no less. They were waitin’ for me.

The bus ride from Vista to Hollywood took several hours. I was sooooo excited, my heart was pounding, and my palms were sweaty. In other words, I was nervous. When I finally arrived in Tinseltown, I was three hours early for the appointment. The longer I waited, the more nervous I got.  This was my big moment!!! The office assistant finally called my name. I went to meet my future big-time agent in her office and remember thinking that “my future was bright and all I had to do was get a small part,” I reasoned to myself.

When I sat down at her desk, my tongue suddenly caught up in my throat and then stuck to the roof of my mouth. My stomach was in knots. I prayed not to vomit. I supplied minimal conversation.  “SAY SOMETHING! ANYTHING!!”  My brain was blank.

The death knell sounded.  The interview lasted all of five minutes and a polite goodbye was soon heard. WAIT! NO! How did this happen?? I was meant to have a big-time career with my new big-time agent but now with my tail between my legs, I left.

Why am I writing this humiliating story?

It is because God was after me. No, not stalking me, but pursuing me. HE was getting my attention.

Why is that” you ask?

I considered myself a nice girl, raised in a Conservative Jewish home. We celebrated the Jewish Holidays, and we kept Kosher just like all my friends did. At age 13, I celebrated my Bat Mitzvah, not to mention I also attended Hebrew school twice a week, which I tried to get out of as often as possible.

Throughout my entire life, the Lord was calling me. So many people passed through every stage of my life and this all directed me to HIM. I did not ask for all this, and I certainly did not deserve His Grace and Love. I knew however, something was always lacking inside me. It was a big hole that needed to be filled.

That brings me to this blog.  I have prayed about why to write it. I felt I had to reach out to others who possibly needed to hear my story. There is much more to it, but for now, please hear my closing thoughts.

You may be struggling with the need for Jesus in your life, as I, too, struggled. God calls us all equally, but some situations make receiving and serving HIM more difficult. I know this intimately. My story does not end here for me—far from it—and neither does yours. There is so much more for you along this road.